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  • Writer's pictureAnna Murphy, FCP

New Year's Resolution: Advocate for your Needs

Merry Christmas! Hopefully you’ve had an awesome Christmas..and the party continues! I know it's a little early for a New Year's blog but it's a principle for everyday life (and the new year gives incentive for things we regularly need).

Let’s talk about a principle that serves in life…you know, what can drive the items you buy at the grocery store, the amount and brand of coffee you buy (hey, nothing wrong with boujee brands of coffee sometimes), the television you let your kids watch (cue Bluey for the 1,000th time), etc. It's advocating for your needs. Before your knee jerk reaction to this, let me give some life examples that most people follow for advocating for what they need. There are small ways in life where we regularly advocate for our needs: buying the ever important coffee/espresso at the store so you can make in your machine the next morning, using a noise machine when you or your child sleeps, buying emergency cup of coffee when you’re falling asleep, etc. There are larger ways too: setting timers for when a task needs to be complete so you can move on to the next thing, telling your spouse what you actually need from them, or setting a time that you go to sleep so you aren’t exhausted the next morning.

Now, there are some things that come naturally that we need as well. Like waking up in the morning and the day beginning, your heart beating to keep you alive, the sun rising and setting (well, maybe not during the winter, but you get the point). Some of our needs are naturally provided for, and others we need some kind of participation in for them to occur. This occurs on a regular basis.

Your fertility and health are not unlike these daily concerns and needs. Your Napro doctor will know about certain medical conditions that they can check you for based on the biomarkers on your chart (not sure what a biomarker is? Reach out for a free consultation with a FertilityCare Practitioner to find out if medical conditions or other concerns can be identified on your chart). There are some standard tests and testing that Napro doctors will run based on certain conditions…but there are some that your doctor or practitioner won’t know about if you don’t tell them. For example, if you have to change pads every half hour and your chart says “H” for heavy days of bleeding, your practitioner and doctor won’t know to check out this abnormal bleeding. Or if start you start a new supplement or medication and have adverse reactions or undesired effects before your follow up…your doctor and practitioner won’t know if you don’t mention it. Always let your doctor know about these things, and your practitioner as well as you fit. Advocating for what you need will result in some desired effect: whether more testing, identifying more biomarkers, stopping adverse side effects etc. And if you have questions: ask them! Whatever embarrassment you might feel asking is worth getting the answer that you want and the desired effect as well.

This applies in marriage too. Need more time with your spouse? Charitably bring this up to them and let them know that you'd like more time together and how to do that. Struggling with finances? Have an honest conversation about it and set a monthly budget together (maybe grab a drink or snack while you do this). Check out our SPICE series (I know, the name might sound funny, but I promise that the principles aren't) for more tips on advocating for your needs as a person, and how that will also help your marriage.

I get it, it may not be the most fun thing to talk about. But it's worth it. Reach out to a FertilityCare Practitioner today to learn how to advocated for your needs!

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